Ken quotes the good book.

Posted by at June 17, 2000 08:23 PM

I am way behind schedule.

Posted by at June 15, 2000 12:55 PM

Clerks Cancelled After Two Episodes

Read Kevin Smith's comments on ABC choosing to cancel Clerks 2 episodes in, and not even air the remaining two. They oughta spell ABC with a U. Disney can suck my cock.

Wait a minute, can I say cock here?

Posted by at June 14, 2000 06:11 PM

(probable if not precise)

DANCE BAND RULES AND REGULATIONS DURING THE 3RD REICH

1) in the repertoire of light orchestras and dance bands, pieces in fox-trot rhythm (so-called swing) are not to exceed 20%;

2) in the repertoire of this so-called jazz type, preference is to be given to compositions in a major key and to lyrics expressing joy in life ("Kraft durch Freude"), rather than Jewishly gloomy lyrics;

3) as to the tempo, too, preference is to be given to brisk compositions as opposed to slow ones (so-called blues); however, the pace must not exceed a certain degree of allegro commensurate with the Aryan sense for discipline and moderation. On no account will negroid excesses in tempo (so-called hot jazz) be permitted, or in solo performances (so-called breaks);

4) so-called jazz compositions may contain at the most 10% syncopation; the remainder must form a natural legato movement devoid of hysterical rhythmic references characteristic of the music of the barbarian races and conducive to dark instincts alien to the German people (so-called "riffs");

5) strictly forbidden is the use of instruments alien to the German spirit (e.g. so-called cowbells, flex-a-tone, brushes,etc.) as well as all mutes which turn the noble sound of brass-wind instruments into a Jewish-Freemasonic yell (so-called wa-wa, in hat, etc.);

6) prohibited are so-called drum breaks longer than half a bar in four quarter beat (except in stylized military marches);

7) the double bass must be played solely with the bow in so-called jazz compositions; plucking of strings is prohibited, since it is damaging to the instrument and detrimental to Aryan musicality. If a so-called pizzicato effect is absolutely desirable for the character of the composition, let strict care be taken lest the string is allowed to patter on the sordine, which is henceforth forbidden;

8) provocative rising to one's feet during solo performance is forbidden;

9) musicians are likewise forbidden to make vocal improvisations (so-called scat); and

10) all light orchestras and dance bands are advised to restrict the use of saxophones of all keys and to substitute for them violon-celli, violas, or possibly a suitable folk instrument.

Signed, Baldur von Blodheim, Reichsmusicfuhrer und Oberscharfuhrer SS

Posted by at June 10, 2000 06:39 PM

Posted by at June 09, 2000 04:23 PM

Posted by at June 05, 2000 01:43 PM

Posted by at June 01, 2000 06:54 PM